July 18th

1290: King Edward I of England banishes all Jews from England, forcing his subjects to go all the way to Ireland for a decent bagel.

1870: The First Vatican Council decrees the dogma of papal infallibility… prompting millions of Catholics to ask the Pope who he likes in the Kentucky Derby.

1969: Senator Ted Kennedy drives an Oldsmobile off a bridge and his passenger, Mary Jo Kopechne, dies. He spends the next 40 years trying to do the same thing to the American economy.